Many organizations insist on performance evaluations at this time of year. And, when we focus on what people do well, we often get better outcomes. As fast as possible. I was supposed to be demure, not aggressive. I was supposed to stop interrupting instead of expressing myself.
I know, introverts actually think before speaking. I have suggestions for everyone involved. First, consider eliminating performance evaluations and focus on feedback—especially about someone does well. I get to be proud of me. Jim, once I got old enough maybe 10 or 11? I think some people like the external recognition. I like external recognition in a different way.
Be proud of that. Did you eat strawberries instead of chips? It can be walking to the store. It can be wearing clothes that make you feel good.
It can be simple things that are going towards the direction where you want to go. I can keep going. Skip to main content Skip to footer. FR Attend. Additionally, in recent years I have provided input to someone to help him achieve some financial milestones and I have always been happy for him in his accomplishments and for how happy those accomplishments made him. Regardless of my input which he could have found on the internet or in a book or any thousands of other ways his accomplishments were not mine to take credit for, to own or to be proud of.
Interesting to read this as a middle-aged woman. I am married but have been jobless for a couple of years and searching hard. Despite being university-educated and having had long-time professional employment until these last two years, the best that was offered to me after an interview recently was a terrible assembly-line factory job where most workers have to quit after just a few month due to quickly developing carpal tunnel or other repetitive strain injuries.
He also suddenly had a few thousand dollars available to offer towards a vehicle so that I could drive to the out-of-town job.
This is all just semantics. I love you. I also wish my parents had told me this more. Agreed, I found this thread about peers telling each other this. Someone is a little off their rocker…. I also can t stand it when they tell there kids how proud they are. There is a toxic feeling that runs through my bones! Being proud of your child and expressing it can be a huge confide booster and a lesson on what are the right priorities in life.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with letting a child know of the positive feelings they generate in you. It teaches them to feel too. Semantics … really just be happy someone cares enough to proud of you or for you or excited about your accomplishments! Sometimes it feels like parents cant ever get it right.
They are human beings with flaws like all of you. This is bs. I do everything I can and I am proud of myself but my parents have never said a word about any of my accomplishments.
There are a million ways to show your child that they are loved and that you care deeply for them and are ecstatic for what they are learning, growing, doing, being!!! I would let them know how you feel. As parents you may think you are helping your child to feel good, but it has the opposite long-term effect. Great to meet another Adlerian Parenting Expert! Love your site too Vicki. Thanks for chiming in on this one! Wow, this entire article blows my mind. What I would have given to hear either of my parents tell me they were proud of me!
I am 56 years old and to this day beam from ear to ear when someone tells me they are proud of me. I will continue to tell my grandchildren how proud I am of them, how smart they are, how beautiful they are…. Having never heard any positive statements growing up is so detrimental. I say tell them both! Fill them with enough positive statements to help them grow a healthy self-esteem!
Translation…what an achievement! Why does everything have to be broken down into words spoken like a psychological major? Yesterday hanging with my sister she reminded me that mother was always so proud of me when I lost weight. It brought back a bad feeling. Me wanting attention feom my mom. I said. She said my mother only wanted me to be happy.
I never told my daughter that I was proud she lost weight. I tell her she always looks great. Not what my mother thought 35 years ago. I hope this is not to confusing. Just to tired to express my anger at my sister. An old article but one that resonates with me nearly 7 years later. I abhor when people say they are proud of me. Some more so than others. And I was actually googling the subject as I thought perhaps I was being silly about it. So very glad to hear I am not the only one. I find it condescending from some that I roll my eyes and walk away, others I might smile politely, but never enjoy those words.
If you say it in your head in a sarcastic tone, then yes, it will sound sarcastic. Similarly, if you say it in a pirate voice, you will sound like a pirate. If you say it in heartfelt way, neither of these would apply. As far as "made that decision", I'm assuming OP would actually mention what the thing is, as in "You know, I'm really glad you decided to go to university".
Le Sunstrike Le Sunstrike 2 2 silver badges 9 9 bronze badges. Lola Brown Lola Brown 1. Please explain your answer. Why do these phrases fit the context? Ricky Ricky So is lust. It's still pretty great in the right context.
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